DivaStar's 101 crazy HP MST's
by DivaStar
Summary: 101 chapters of HP humor, with a little H/Hr on the side!
1. Default Chapter

***Disclaimer:   
Roses are red,  
Violets are blue.  
I no own,  
So you, no sue.  
Also I am a horrible speller, so, you are warned.  
I would also like to dedicate this MST to Kaori for inspiring me to do this!  
I hope you enjoy!***  
  
  
Setting: Gryffindor common room (which is currently empty). The only difference is that now there is what appears to be a giant computer screen mounted in the wall above the fire place. There is also a large circular, white velvet couch hovering about four feet above the ground, amidst the regular chairs and couches. It's the DivaStar Crazy Couch!!! ( A/N: I give Kaori credit for this Idea).  
  
::a girl suddenly appears in the room::  
  
DivaStar: Hello! I am DivaStar, also referred to as Diva, and I will be hosting this Fic! Now. I would like you to meet my friends, and co. hosts of this story.   
  
::Snaps fingers and two other girls appear::  
  
DivaStar: this is Chantal ::points to the girl on her right::, and this is Emily, who I will also call Emy ::points to the girl on her left::  
  
Emily & Chantal: Hello! ::both take seats on the large couch, placed directly in front of the screen::  
  
DivaStar: now then lets meet our fellow MiST'rs, at least the ones we will begin with! ::snaps fingers again ( A/N; hehehe. I just LOVE these author powers!)::  
  
::Harry Potter, Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley, Emma Watson, Rupert Grint, Sean Biggerstaff, and Daniel Radcliffe also appear in the room (and the door is locked, in case you didn't know)::  
  
::they all look around very confused::  
  
DivaStar: Hello again!!  
  
:: all look at me, and there faces (except sean) change to an expression of horror::  
  
Dan &Harry: You! AHHHHHHHH!!!!!  
Rest(meaning all the characters and actors except Sean): Uhoh  
Sean: What? What's wrong?  
Emma: your Kaori's friend aren't you!?! The one from all those MST chapters!?!?  
Ron: Damn! I was hoping I was seeing things.  
DivaStar: Yep, it's me! Mwahahahahahahaha! (A/N: this is my evil laugh)!! I would also like to introduce my friends! This is Emily and Chantal, remember the ones I told you about in one of my reviews on kaori's story?  
Hermione: ::to Emily:: aren't you the one that thinks Sean is cute?  
Emily: ::blushing:: yeah.   
Harry: ::to Chantal:: and you are the one that also thinks Dan is Hot, right?  
Chantal: ::also blushing, glances at Dan:: Um, yep.  
Sean: ::to Emily:: You really think I am cute?!? Cool!  
::he sits down next to Emily on the couch, and drapes an arm around her shoulders::  
::Emily promptly faints, from happiness::  
All: O.o  
Chantal & Diva: ::burst out in laughter::  
All: O.O  
Diva: ::Still fighting back laughter:: okay, now back to business…  
Hermione: ::who had been scanning the room finally spots the crazy Couch:: YES!!! She has a crazy couch, maybe it won't be so bad after all !  
Emma: Whoohooo! Yippe!  
::both girls launch themselves onto the crazy couch::  
All(this doesn't include me(diva), or Chantal & Emily): O.o  
Chantal & Emily(who just woke back up): ::giggles::  
DivaStar: Oh no you don't, hermione!  
Hermione: what!?!  
DivaStar: remember what I said, that when I wrote a story it would be 'H/Hr all the way'? Well it is.  
Harry&Hermione: ::groan, in misery::  
::Diva takes out her wand, and with a flick, another, smaller, round couch appears. Hermione and Harry are instantly transported onto it::  
Harry: ::tries to climb of the couch, only to find that there is an invisible wall blocking him from doing so:: What did you do!?!?!?  
DivaStar: ::smiling innocently:: nothing.  
Hermione: And since when did YOU have a wand!  
DivaStar: Hey, you forgot I am an author now! That also means that I have author powers now, too!  
Harry: ::goes and sits back down next to hermione, and folders his arms:: Humfh!  
DivaStar: Now, just one last thing… ::flicks wand again, and Daniel comes flying toward the couch, landing right between Diva and Chantal::  
Chantal: ::squeals excitedly:: Yipee!!  
Dan: Aaaaauuuuurrrrggggghhhhhh! ::slumps down looking defeated, as both Chantal and Diva scoot towards him::  
DivaStar: Now then. Lets start our first MSTing!  
All: Aaawwwwwwwaaaaaaaaaa……..  
  
## okay, I got the first chapter done, yippee!!!!! Also, Kaori, you are free to MST this for your new story "Kaori's uncommon HP MST's", if you like! I hope you enjoyed this!, and please review I would like to hear your comments, and don't worry, it will get crazier!## 


	2. 2) The prank wars. hehe!

Sean: Hey, Emily? Would you like to, maybe, go some where, maybe grab a bite to eat?  
Emily: I would LOVE that. ::both disappear::   
All: ::sniggering::  
Chantal: I knew that was going to happen…  
Diva: ::rolls eyes:: tell me about it…  
Diva: Ok, new cast. Chantal you can go…   
Chantal: OK, Bye! ::disappears::  
Diva: ::Snaps fingers Dan, Rupert, and Emma also disappear:: …and we will need some new people…::snaps fingers and James, Lily, Sirius, and Remus appear::  
New comers: Uh,oh  
Diva: yes, uh,oh indeed. Mwahahahahahah!  
  
Author: Lavander - PG - English   
  
The Prank Wars.  
  
Part 1  
The Meeting  
By: Lavander Blues and Violet Rose  
  
Harry: ::sniggering:: hey Ron, look its lavander. Oooooohhhhhh…  
Ron: ::blushing:: Shut up!  
Hermione: Ooooohhh. Ron likes lavender!  
Ron: ::blushing even more:: Do not!  
Harry & Hermione: ::In a singsong voice:: Ron and Lavander sitting in a tree, K..I..S..S..I..N..G….  
  
Start of disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. J.K Rowling does. Don't sue me. End of disclaimer.  
  
Diva: end of disclaimer? Who says that!  
Remus: apparently, this person  
  
A/N: This, I guess takes place during Harry's Fifth year at Hogwarts. It is based more on Fred, George and two special guests though. Muwahahaha. Enjoy!  
  
Diva: She took my evil laugh!!!  
Lily: your evil what?  
Diva: Laugh! My evil laugh! That is mine! Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine! MINE!  
Lily: ::whispers to James:: she really needs to calm down ::James nods head in agreement::  
  
It was a quite day at Hogwarts. Fred and George were practicing making time potions in their favorite class, potions.  
  
Ron: Favorite!?! How can that be anyone's favorite!  
  
Fred: It's only our favorite class because we can play tricks on Snape and get away without him ever knowing!  
  
Ron: Oh, OK. That explains it.  
  
George: Yeah, it so much fun. Here's our next trick. *holds up a small bottle of the vertias serum*  
  
All: uh,oh. Trouble  
  
Fred: Where did you get that, George?  
  
Ron: he probably 'found' it some where  
  
George: I 'found' it when we were leaving here last week.   
  
All: O.O  
Ron: freaky…  
Remus: tell me about it…  
  
Fred: Oh, I wonder if Professor Snape has noticed it missing yet?  
  
George: Nope. Now, we have to put it in his water some how.  
  
All (except J&S): Uh,Oh!  
Sirius: man, why didn't we ever think of that!  
James: I know, but still, we have had our fair share of good jokes.  
  
Just then, Snape left the classroom for a few minutes. Fred snuck up to the front of the classroom and was about to put some of the vertias serum in his cup when a blinding flash of light appeared from behind him. HE turned around to see two boys about the same age as him arguing over something. The first one was kinda tall and resembled Harry a whole lot, except for his eyes. The second one looked like a younger and happier version of Sirius Black.   
  
Sirius: Oh great. Another 'back to the future story'  
James: ::starts banging head::  
Lily: James stop, you'll hurt your self ::pulls him back, into a huge::  
James: I love you, lily  
Lily: I love you too, James. ::kisses him::  
Harry: ::bursts into tears::  
Hermione: Harry? Harry, what's wrong?…  
Harry: I…I n-n-never got t-to know my p-pa-parents, a-a-and n-now t-th-this….  
Hermione: Awwww, poor baby…::starts hugging him, rocking him like a small child…::  
Ron: @.@  
Lily: aww, that's so sweet.  
  
Boy 1: Professor Arsenic told us not to drink it you dimwit.  
  
Sirius: Professor Arsenic, like as in Arsenic poisoning? ::laughing hysterically::  
Remus: Arsenic? I don't remember a professor Arsenic…  
Sirius: ::laughs even harder::  
  
Boy 2: Uh, you're the one who made me drink it James.  
  
The first boy was obviously named James, which struck George as odd considering he looked almost the same as Harry. The second one was looking around the classroom in shock.  
  
James: Well, I'd say we're still at Hogwarts, wouldn't you Sirius.  
  
Hermione: "I don't think we're in Kansas anymore" ::Hermione and Lily start giggling::  
R/R/S/J: I don't get it  
Lily: Muggle thing… Never mind  
  
Sirius: Most likely the future Hogwarts, because none of the people in here look like they're from our class.  
  
James: Yeah, really, look, here comes the Professor for this class. Maybe if we ask him, he can tell us what year we're in.  
  
All: Duh!  
  
Sirius: Why don't we just ask one of the students.  
  
All: ::rolls eyes::  
  
.James: Fine *turns to Fred* Excuse me, could you tell us what year we are in?  
  
Fred: *staring in shock* Yeah, sure, it's 2000.   
  
Diva: no it's not. It's 2002!  
All: O.o  
Diva: What! It is!  
All: o.O   
Diva: Aurgh, never mind!  
  
Sirius: See, I told ya we were in the future.  
  
James: Zip it Sirius. * to Fred* Um, what classroom is this?  
  
Harry: ::finally sitting back up:: Potions, and, thanks Hermione I feel lots better now ::blushing::  
Hermione: ::also blushing:: you're welcome (A/N; remember they are still on that couch)  
  
Fred: Potions.  
  
James: Well, at least we're in the same class.  
  
Snape had just walked in and was staring in shock and horror.  
  
All: ::sniggering::   
  
Snape: *in a shaky voice* Oh. My. God, my past has come back to haunt me.  
  
Sirius: ::sarcastically:: oooohhh, look I am the ghost from Christmas past, run for your lives!  
  
Snape ran and hid, cowering behind his desk. He looked at the two boys from the past, and made a cross with his fingers.   
  
All: :: burst into hysterical laughter::  
  
Snape: Go away! Leave me alone! I promise I'll be good! Just go away!  
  
Ron, Harry & Hermione: yeah, right! He couldn't be nice if he tried!  
  
James and Sirius walked over to Snape with evil grins on their faces.   
  
Remus: uh,oh I smell trouble…  
  
Together: Boo.  
  
Snape screamed and ran out of the room  
  
All: ::rolling on the floor in laughter (except H/Hr who are still traped on the couch)  
James: Awwwwwww….. Did we scare little Snapy poo? Maybe he's gone for good…  
  
Harry& Ron: ::look at each other:: Snapy poo? ::commpetly lose it::  
DivaStar: they have commpletly lost it.   
  
Sirius: Poor baby…  
  
Sirius: ::rolls eyes:: yeah right. Like I would EVER feel sorry for him!  
Diva: I know what you mean.  
  
James: Aw, we didn't get rid of him! Man, I was hoping for on lesson 'Snape- free'  
  
H/Hr & Ron: we know the feeling.  
James: the sad part is I would actually say that  
Sirius: ::sniggering::  
  
Sirius: I know the feeling.  
  
All: O.o  
H/Hr & Ron: freaky. Vary freaky. (A/N; the really freaky part is that I hadn't even planned for that to happen!)  
  
All the students were staring as Snape suddenly screamed and ran away.  
Snape was outside the room, trying to collect his thoughts.  
  
Harry: ::hopefully:: Maybe he's finally gone mental!  
Hermione: with our luck, I doubt it.  
  
Snape thinking: It's all a dream. It's just a dream. That's it. I've been around my dream potions for two long. I need a vacation. All just a dream. When I walk beck in there, everything will be fine…  
  
Remus: no it won't  
Diva: tell me about it  
  
.Snape walked into the class, looked around and upon seeing that it was not, in fact, a dream, screamed: NO!!!! NOT THEM AGAIN!!! AHHH!!!! DUMBLEDORE, HELP ME!!!! WHY, WHY ,WHY, CAN'T THIS BE A DREAM!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!  
  
James: I always knew he would flip some day.  
  
James: I always knew he would flip some day.  
  
All: O.O  
Lily: James, sweety, you are starting to scare me.  
  
All of the students had ran to the door and stared after Snape. Fred and George turned to James and Sirius.  
  
George: How'd you do that?  
  
All: ::roll eyes::  
  
Sirius: Um...I don't know.   
  
All: ::roll eyes again::  
Diva: ok, stop it your scaring me!  
Ron &Harry: we're scaring her ::give each other high fives:: Yes!  
Diva: ::hits them both upside the head with a rolled up news paper::  
R&H: ow…  
Fred: Snape has never run away from anyone acting like a psychotic idiot before. We *he waved his arms, indicating himself and George* should know. We've tried.  
  
Ron: bet they have..  
Harry: Knowing them, they have…  
Hermione: unfortunately..   
  
George: That was too weird.   
  
All: we Know!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Elsewhere… in transfiguration.  
  
Harry: I REALLY don't want to see were this is going…  
Diva: Tough. You have to anyway ::Harry pouts::  
  
Professor McGonnagall: Today we will be turning….  
  
Hermione: Matches into needles!  
All: O.o  
Lily: that's what we had to do during our first lesson.  
Ron: ::dully:: so did we  
Remus: ::Laughing:: Boy, how times change…  
  
She was suddenly interrupted by Snape running down the hall screaming.  
  
All: ::sniggering::  
  
Snape: He's come back to haunt me!!! No!! Help me!! He has his sidekick with him!! AHH!! GOD NO!!!   
  
James: ::completely losing it again, is laughing and rolling around on the floor:: HEHEHEHHEHE!!!……  
Sirius: I am NOT his sidekick! Best friend and sidekick. There's a difference!  
Remus: actually, you were kinda more like a sidekick…::lily nods in agreance::  
  
McGonnagall: *runs into hall and stops Snape* What is all the commotion about Severus. I'm trying to teach my students!  
  
Ron: but Hermione's the only one that ever listens…::Hermione glares at him::  
  
Snape: *claming down slightly* My *pant* class *pant pant*   
  
McGonnagall: Yes what about your class.  
  
All: ::roll eyes::  
  
Snape: They *pant* them *pant, pant* they're back *looks horrified*  
  
All: ::Sniggering behind their hands::  
  
By this time the whole hall is full of students wondering what was going on. Harry walked up to Professor Snape to see if he could help (though I don't know why he would want to).   
  
Harry:: 'cause I wouldn't, that's why!  
Ron: ::shaking head:: Too true, too true…  
  
Harry: Who's them, Professor Snape?  
  
James&Sirius: Us, That's who!  
Others: ::rolling eyes and shaking heads::  
Diva: ya know, there seems to be a Lot of eye rollin' around here…  
  
Snape: *looks at Harry and screams* AUGGHHH!!!! POTTER!!! AUGH!! KEEP HIM AWAY!!!!   
  
All: ::give the screen a weird look::  
  
McGonnagall gave Snape a weird look.   
  
Characters: o.O  
Diva: there seems to be a lot of that too…  
Characters: ::look at Diva:: O.o  
Diva: ::rolls eyes:: oh, never mind…  
  
McGonnagall: He's not going to do anything to you, Severus. He's a harmless boy.   
  
Harry: ::indignantly:: Hey!  
Hermione: ::pats him on the back:: It's okay. We know your not. You're a great and powerful wizard…  
Diva: ::whispers to James, Lily, Remus, and Sirius:: I really need to get those to together…  
Ron: Hey! ::eyes diva suspiciously:: What are you whispering about over there…  
Diva: Nothing! Nothing, at all!  
  
Snape just stared at Harry with the look of utmost fear. Harry found this kind of awkward, considering the look was usually full of despise.  
  
Diva: Loathing! In the books it always says loathing!  
Others: @.@  
Diva: whops…  
  
Snape: He's… he's… he's gonna play a prank on me!!! I don't know how he got from my classroom to up here but somehow he did it and now he's gonna play a prank on me!!   
  
James&Sirius: ::Bitterly:: wish we could…  
  
Harry: Um.. Professor, I've been in the transfiguration class the whole time.   
  
Harry: I am always the first person everyone suspects…  
Hermione: ::puts an arm around him:: I wouldn't..  
Harry: ::smiles at her and blushes:: thanks Herm..  
Diva: ::quietly:: Aw, they look so cute together! ::lily nods::  
  
McGonnagall: *realizes who Snape is talking about*   
  
James&Sirius: ::pounding on the floor, laughing their butts off…::  
  
McGonnagall: So… y-y-you don't mean…  
  
Sirius: Yes, Yes he does!  
  
Snape: Yes, yes I do!  
  
All(except Sirius): O.o  
Remus: Padfoot what did you have for breakfast this morning?…  
Sirius: ::thinking:: well lets see… A bout two bowls of sugar, and a pound of candy….  
All: Uh,oh….  
Diva: Spagetios! ::giggles::  
All: o.O  
  
McGonnagall: GODDDDD NOOOOOOOO!!! Not them again! They're worse than Fred and George!!!!!!!!!!!!   
  
Sirius: Dum,Dum,Dum!  
Others: ::roll eyes::  
  
DUMMMMMMBBBBBBLLLLLLLLEEEEEDOREEEEEEE!!!!!  
  
Harry: Worse than Fred and George? The only people that I can think of that would possible be worse than Fred and George would be….. um…. Sirius as a kid, and my ddddaaaaaaaadddddd…. my god.  
  
Harry: ::looks at james and Sirius in admaration:: wow, I didn't know you were that good..  
Hermione: shouldn't that be 'Oh my god' not 'my god'?…  
  
Harry took off running at top speed down the hall.  
A few flights of stairs, one missing door, another moving staircase, and a few dozen hallways later, Harry was in potions class, where students were talking about who the new kids were.  
Before entering the classroom, Harry paused.  
  
Harry talking to himself: It was just a coincidence. That's all. My dad is dead. Nothing a spirit, like my mom. My dad is not here right now. (AN: Sounds a little familiar, eh?)  
  
All: no.  
Harry: when was she a spirit? A shadow yeah…But not a spirit.  
  
Harry ran into the room, and like Snape, looked around the room. Upon seeing James and Sirius, he paused, then ran up to them.  
  
Harry: It's really you!   
  
James: um, yeah?  
  
Harry ran and gave James a hug.  
  
Harry: I'm so glad to see you!  
  
Harry: no duh!  
Diva: ::rolls eyes:: Harry, shut up…  
  
James gave Harry the oddest look, then turned to Sirius.  
  
James: *whispering* this guy gay?  
  
Harry: ::vary indignantly:: Hey!  
James: don't look at me!  
  
Sirius: *also whispering* I dunno. How could I? All I know is that your twin just walked in the door…  
  
James: I don't HAVE a twin!  
  
James: *still whispering* Twin what are you talking about?  
  
Lily: why are they whispering?  
Remus: Duno…  
  
Sirius: *yep, still whispering* Haven't you noticed! The only difference between the two of you is the eyes. Hummm..  
  
All: We noticed!  
  
James: *whispering* I have a twin in the future?  
  
Lily: No, stupid!  
James: Hey, don't call me stupid!  
Lily: ::smirking:: I thought that wasn't you?  
James: Oh… right…  
  
Sirius: *whispering* Maybe he's your future son.  
  
James: *whispering* What! I'm never gonna have kids! They are two much of a pain in the rear!  
  
Harry: Hey! are not!  
Lily: yeah.. But they do hurt…  
Others: O.O  
Lily: oh shut up…  
  
Sirius: *whispering* What ever…  
  
Remus: why are they STILL whispering?!?  
  
Harry got off James, and looked around. For some reason, Ron was in the room, talking to Fred and George, and was now giving Harry one of the oddest looks.  
  
Ron: What are you doing, Harry?  
  
Harry pulled Ron over to the side.  
  
Harry: Ron, that's my dad!  
  
Ron: Right, like I wouldn't recognize the famous 'James Potter', who also happens to look EXACTLY like harry!  
  
Ron looked over to the boys: What? Your dad? Are you sure?  
  
Harry: How many 'James Potter's' do you know?  
  
All: one, duh!  
  
Ron looked up in shock, then walked over to James. He shook his hand.   
  
Ron: Sir, I must say that I am honored to met you. You, who stood up to the great   
Lord… I mean, he-who-must-not-be-named. A true hero, you are, sir!  
  
Diva: that was SSSSSOOOOOO lame!  
Ron: I know..  
Harry: what about Voldemort? I was the one who defeated him, not m------  
Hermione: Oh give it a rest Harry…  
  
Harry stood by the door and shook his head.  
  
Harry thinking: He's more like Percy every day…. And if he could read my thoughts, I wouldn't be walking right now. I'd be dead.  
  
Ron: Darn tootin, you would…  
Others: O.o  
  
James: Huh? First a guy gives me a hug, and then you're shaking my hand…  
  
Sirius: Weird.  
  
Sirius: Weird.  
  
All: O.O  
  
Dumbledore walked in.  
  
Dumbledore: James, Sirius, how nice to see you again. Although. You picked a rather odd place to appear.   
  
All: No duh!  
Diva: Ok, next chapter!  
Others: ::groan::  
  
(A/N I may or may not continue MSTing this story, it all depends on your reviews. And also, the last part of this story disappeared, just so you know….) 


End file.
